Jou San, Joi Kin, Syaoran
by Black Nightshade
Summary: Meilin is back in Hong Kong going over how she's been feeling since Syaoran's return to Japan. Will she ever get over him, and can his mother help her do it? R/R Please! First Meilin fic


**Jou San, Joi Kin, Syaoran**  
By Black Nightshade

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In my head your voice I cease to hear  
Something in my mind never seems to fear  
But though I try to stay strong..It's hard to act like nothing's wrong  
When I saw her smiling face.. then you had disappeared..  
I try to stick to those times, the times before you said goodbye  
Before you left to a foreign land, and left me.. on my own to stand..  
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Meilin sat on a futon by her open window. The gentle nights wind blew, caressing her tear-stained cheek, raven black hair flowing about her face in gentle strands, buns atop her head gentle swaying. Meilin brought up her hand, long stick burning in her hand as she lit the candle before her. Sighing, she blew the stick out, watching the candles' flame burn brightly, lightening the darkened room. Meilin took a pale hand and brung it to her cheek, softly brushing away her tears. It had been almost a year now since her return to Hong Kong, and Syaoran's return to Japan... and Sakura's win of his heart. Every night she lit a candle for his welfare, every night she prayed on the same star for his happiness, and ever night her mask fell and shattered, leaving her alone to cry once more. 

She thought back to the first day of her return, the day her parents and the entire tribe learned of Syaoran's new love, and her loss of one. Everyone at first was shocked, but celebrated secretly in silence, while Meilin had to learn to let her face lie, so her true feelings wouldn't be known. She at first, too, pretended to be happy for him, partaking in the celebrations, laughing making jokes over it with Fanren, racing with Shiefa, and storytelling by a lighted fire with Futtie and Feimei. Even the elders bought her act, patting her head and telling her what a wise girl she is, that she made the right disicion, and that glory would come to her one day. She could fool the tribe, she could fool herself, but she couldn't fool Ieran, her aunt, consequently her deepest desires' mother as well. 

It was a sunny day, Meilin had parted away from her cousins, sitting on a rock, plucking the petals from a flower. Ieran had noticed this well, since Meilin was just as outgoing as the others, only conflicting emotions would make her sit out from the games. "Meilin, what are you doing sitting here alone? Go, play with your cousins." Meilin shook her head, plastering a smile on her face. "M'hai, I'd rather sit here and smell the flowers, I will later" Ieran shook her head. "Meilin.. your looks deseve me well. Tell me, what troubles you child?" Meilin kept the smile. "Nothing, Nothing at all!" Ieran looked her strait in the eyes. "Meilin.." She sighed. "Fine.. I just.." Meilin frowned, looking down in shame. "It's Xiao Lang, isn't it?" Meilin nodded slightly. "There will be someone for you, Meilin.. enjoy yourself while you can.. there is always a good point to a bad.. a phrase my mother had taught me... Even if the ramen is dry, soak it a night and be patient, perfection will be found by the next moon" Meilin looked confused for a moment, then nodded understanding the proverb, hugged her aunt, then stood up and ran to play with the others, inside her heart still breaking. 

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Jou San heaven's angel...  
Joi Kin my sweetest loss  
M'goi for letting me love you..  
Dou m'jui I'll leave you now!  
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One tear dripped down her cheek as she stood up, her aunt's words repeating in her mind. "Be strong, Meilin. You where destined for something different!" She nodded her head as she talked to herself, trying to make herself believe the lies she told. Meilin walked out of her home, the wind beginning the blow slightly harder against her, the sounds of evening crickets echoing throughout the air. The wind seemed to talk to her, trying to deter her movements, while the cricket's gentle chirping coaxed her on further. Closing her eyes she moved onward, the skies parting as lightening ripped through the silky white clouds, thunder shaking the earth beneath her feet. Meilin looked up as the first droplet of water feel upon her nose and cascaded down her face. "I'm not going to give up now.. I lost my love, but I won't loose my honor!" 

At that moment Meilin didn't know where she was headed, but she was determined to get there. Meilin's feet splashed through puddles as the rain began to downpour. Meilin wrapped her arms around herself, shivers shooting up her back. Her nose twitched, then she unleashed a sneeze. Still determined as ever, she pushed on. Meilin looked from one hut to another, all the lights off in each of them. She shook her head, imagining the happy families inside, warm in their cozy houses. Things sometimes didn't seem fair to her. Why was she the one with the stubborn fiancee who made it a point to go fall in love with not one, but two people, neither of which where her. She was a strong girl, not really bad looking, and a fast running, if anything she was hopelessly devoted to him in each and every way. Squinting her eyes she saw a person walking toward her with it's arms outstretched. At first she thought it was her Syaoran come back to her, but then reality hit and she figured if it was him it was nothing but a hallucination. 

Just before she reached the shadowy figure, she fell to her knees. She had walked long and hard, and the weather wore her down to no extent. She finally fainted before her hallucinated savior, being caught in it's warm embarrass before her head hit the cold, wet, ground. The figure lifted her damp body from the ground, cradling in it it's arms as it began walking towards the place it came from, Meilin held to it's chest. Lightening flashed around the sky, thunder yelling out it's wrath over the cowering heavens. 

Meilin stirred. Her eyes slowly fluttered open, peering around her surroundings in a blurry haze. The smell of fresh noodles wafted through the air. Meilin sat up, finding herself covered up to her neck with a hand made blanket. She found herself very warm, though the tips of her hair still dripped with the sky's water. She rubbed her eyes a bit, the blurriness beginning the clear from them. She felt a slight shock of shame go through her as the weakness of her fall soaked in. "Meilin, nei hou ma? Are you alright?" Meilin looked to her side, face to face with her so-called hallucination... which actually turned out to be a real savior to her, someone who she owed much to... 

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Yew gei noi ..get over you,   
Nei hou ma .. how am I  
Why'd you leave me here to cry?!  
Funny how life turned with the setting sun  
Love her, Forget me! Cousins, Friends..  
But lovers not and that's how it will be..  
Syaoran...wo...oi...ney...  
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"Ieran..." Meilin gasped out. Ieran smiled down at her, brushing some hair from her face. "I'm better now..M'Goi.." Ieran hugged Meilin. "What where you doing walking in such weather? I've heard of training but this is a little more...well.. extreme. My niece, tell me, does it plague you still?" Meilin looked away, Ieran hooking her finger around Meilin's chin, moving it gently back to her. Meilin looked sadly into Ieran's eyes. Ieran simply nodded... "My son never meant to hurt you.. you know this. Sometimes arrangements become broken. He cares for you, Meilin. But not the way it had been originally planned. He is happy, is that not what you want?" Meilin felt her eyes fill with tears but she blinked them back. "Hai.. that's what I want." Ieran smiled, then offered Meilin some Chinese herbal tea. 

"Look, Meilin, the smoke rises strait to the heavens. It means good luck." Meilin stared at her cup of tea, then sipped it slowly. Ieran brought over a book then slowly opened the lovely leather-bound cover. Meilin trailed her fingers over it, then peered inside. Her eyes sparkled as she flipped through the golden-edged papers, Ieran looking over her shoulder satisfied. A smile tugged at Meilin's lips as she looked at the pictures. Ieran pointed to one. "There, that's you and Syaoran racing... and over there.." she trailed her finger to the next "Is when you first showed signs of liking him." she giggled then turned the page. "And that's the first time you glomped him. Meilin, your a strong warrior, competitive, but so loving. You have the potential to be the best in everything you do. One loss is no reason to call it quits..." 

Meilin looked up at her, Ieran stroking her hair. "You only need one person in your life to depend on-yourself. If you try you'll find your own white knight.. and it'll be by your own choice, not ours. Life can take away everything you have.. but it can give back just as much as it takes. You have to be strong, keep your honor but never let it get to your head. Know I, your cousins, and yes, Syaoran care for you.. even Sakura cares for you. Just open your eyes a bit wider.. and your heart as well.. let it heal, my little niece." Meilin found tears running down her cheeks but she rubbed them away and hugged her aunt. "Your right, Aunt Irean.. I don't know what I'd do without you.." Ieran chuckled. "You'd do just fine. Meilin closed her eyes, snuggling against her aunt's chest, her mind clearing for the first time, feeling a little less missing from her life. "Yes, Meilin.. you'll be just fine.. Aunt Irean is wise.. and I young.. Jou tan, Joi kin.. my.. no... not my.. her Syaoran..." the words stung her for admitting the truth, but she felt at ease with herself and everything else.. and just for tonight.. saying Goodbye would be the easy part.. 

**-The End-**

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Hi hi! I hope ya'll enjoyed the fanfiction. I've never tried doing a fic of Meilin, though she is my favorite character. Strange, ne? Please do read and respond! All right? Also, if you wish, do tell if you want me to do another fic on Meilin, I'm not really sure if this came out good or bad. Anyways, I used a lot of Cantonese phrases/terms in this story so look below for a little bit of an overview of the words I used ^.^; I have a thing with trying to be traditional o.o; Ja Ne de Bai Bai! 

Dictionary of Cantonese Terms  
Ieran-Syaoran's Mother/Meiling's Aunt  
Yew Gei Noi-How long does it take  
Nei hou ma- How are you  
Jou San- Good Morning  
Jou Tan- Good Night  
Dou M'Jui- I'm Sorry  
Wo Oi Ney-I love you  
M' Goi- Thank You  
Xiao Lang-Syaoran  
Joi Kin- Good Bye  
M'Hai- No  
Hai-Yes  
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